As black as coal

Many people who have dark complexion, face humiliating comments by the society. The ones who are emotionally strong succeeds in ignoring those comments and they look at themselves with love because God has made them and He is the best of all artists. They feel comfortable in their own skin. They know what others say/think about them is not the point of view they have of themselves. But some are severly affected by those comments. Remember dark skin tone, medium skin tome, light skin tone they are all beautiful.

To all those people who unintentionally or intentionally tell others that they are black or in my mother language they say kaali, taway jesa rang hai is ka, or they are told to use fairness creams. Stop! It is high time. Stop calling others with hurtful nicknames. Stop making others feel bad about themselves. Stop hurting others. Don’t try making them believe your concept of beauty!

And to all those strong people out there who have face these harsh comments, listen! “What others say about you doesn’t matter at all. Beauty of heart matters. If you are a good human being that is what matters. Feel confident and comfortable in your own skin. Love yourself unconditionally for you are as important as anyone else is!”

I know it is easier said than done. It is tough but I believe you are stronger than this. You are beautiful and smart in your own way.

We can be the change we wish to see.




I love complementing people, telling them they are caring, beautiful, smart, or simply telling them I feel happy when they are around. It may seem like I am sugary/very sweet but that is a part of my personality. I genuinely love complementing people. I do that by heart and In Shaa Allah I will continue doing that. See life is tough and maybe by saying one kind word, meeting someone with excitement, giving them a tiny little card and telling them how precious they are can make someone happy even for a second, it is worth it! We don’t know what the other person is going through, every single one of us is fighting a battle, and when we put positivity out there into the universe our own self becomes a happier person. So the moral of the post is be kind, give complements, love yourself, love others, and spread positivity.

“Kind words are precious
And like a cherry sweet
its enough; just one or two
to give the heart a treat

They are just like fairies
To love- they lead the way
No matter what situation
Just one can make your day

They work magically
Turning a frown into a smile
Your words, believe it or not
Makes someoneโ€™s life worthwhile.”

-poem by Marinela Reka

(Be a rainbow in someone else’s cloud.)


Why is it so vital to talk to yourself positively? Because the way we talk to ourself determines how much we value ourself. Do we care about ourself the way we care about others? Are we kind to ourself? Do we give unconditional love to ourself? 
The single significant factor in influencing our thoughts and our actions is self-talk. Listen to your thoughts and it will unveil the greatest influencing factor in your life. For example I made a mistake either I can tell myself you are careless or I can assure myself that next time I will be careful. And wise is the person who accepts his/her mistake and learns from it. We are human beings capable of making mistakes. We need to understand that there are times going to come when we will feel like we can’t do enough, be enough and that’s the time we need to tell ourselves that ‘I am doing my best, and that is what matters.’ 

Being kind to yourself is as important as being kind to others. Try not to compare yourself to anyone. We are not perfect beings. We are all unique in our own way. One thing can be your strength while the same thing can be the weakness of the other person. Believe in yourself, have faith in yourself. Have positive private speech (self-talk). Appreciate yourself even when no one appreciates you, give kind, beautiful comments to yourself, be gentle with yourself. Take care of yourself. Be the source of light for yourself as well as for others too. 

May God give us strength to deal with whatever we are going through and make us all strong. Ameen. 

*(My posts are also for myself so that when I feel down I can read it and remind myself once again I have the power to modify my thoughts)*

Sometimes it is okay๐Ÿƒ

Sometimes it is okay to feel how you feel whether you are sad, disappointed, frustrated, or angry. Accepting your feelings is a crucial part of life. Just feel how you feel. Tell yourself that you are willing to experience your thoughts and feelings without judging them as good or bad. Take a deep breath and say, “I understand that struggling against my feelings leads to more suffering than simply experiencing them as they are.” “My thoughts are something that I have. They are not who I am.” “They are not always the complete truth and I do not have to act on them.” Sometimes the best thing to do is to lie down, to relax, and to feel how you feel. Take deep breaths. It is okay to be sad, to be frustrated, to be angry. What matters is how you react. You didn’t gave your feelings importance or you simply acknowledged how you felt?ย Maybe meditation, walk, jogging, or any healthy coping strategy seems useless for the time being but it is not useless. Maybe taking deep breaths will make you feel like this is non-sense what am I even doing but it works. With time I have come to realize that in my case meditation is my happy pill which helps me to calm down. I sometimes close my eyes, imagine I am lying down on the grass, there are clouds floating in the sky with the label of my feelings on it, I take deep breaths and simply observe them floating. It helps me to calm down and relax when I feel stressed or when I feel mad about something and I can’t do anything.ย Oh meditation my happy pill. ๐Ÿ’Šย 

I found an obligingย account on instagram by the name breathe_away which is the best account for deep breathing exercise plus I love their quotations. Do check their account if you are searching for some good deep breathing apps or accounts. Hope it will help you too. ๐ŸŒ 

Akhlaq-Code of Conduct

I really emphasize on talking to anyone with respect and dignity. No matter how poor or rich, younger or elder they are I always try my best to talk to them with respect not because they deserve it but because this shows me. This shows how I am as a person. I really like it when someone gives me respect and that feeling is priceless. Your good code of conduct can even make a person who dislikes you, start liking you.

I had a teacher who didn’t used to like me and I used to be rude with her too. One day I gave myself a challenge “you know what Ayesha lets make her like you.” I was 16 at that time so, that was quite challenging for me. I started respecting her. No rolling eyes (yes I used to roll my eyes and she used to hate it which used to make me happy :p It was fun seeing her making that angry bird face :p and my whole class used to laugh which was a big reinforcer for me) or negative body language. I used to always complete the homework she gave, be on time, and took part during her lectures. And I succeeded. Lol! I became a good student. She said she loved seeing change in me ๐Ÿ™‚ In my heart I still don’t like her but disrespecting her wasn’t giving me anything. Was it? No. By giving someone respect will never make us feel inferior. I am not saying that you should always talk with respect but at least try your best. If you can’t give them respect then don’t even disrespect them specially on the basis of age, color, caste, social or economic status. And if you are way too angry or you hate a person or if you don’t have authority to say anything then keep quiet because there is no use of screaming infront of a mad man. In the end I am going to say “give respect, have respect.” Be a nice human being because this world needs kind and loving people more. 


I always write about things that I personally follow. For I believe there is no use of telling someone to do something without following it by myself.
So today I am going to talk about “GOALS”.
Usually everyone has some goals in life that they work hard to achieve. Goals makes us feel worthy and fulfils our need for achievement. Goals can be made on daily basis or it could be long term. A simple example of a goal could be daily making up your bed before leaving for university, school or office. Your goals must be: SMART!

Short term goals helps us to achieve our long term goals. I really believe in short term goals, because it gives me feeling of accomplishment much more earlier than the long term ones which keeps me motivated. But you need to be consistent in order to achieve your goals and this process will definitely require lots of patience.

I always wanted to be more active and for that I started from a really basic goal which was making up my bed before leaving for university. For one week I just did that, then next week I added up another goal which was cleaning my cupboard after two days, then I continued adding weekly goals as the time passed. And one day came when I was able to achieve my long term goal that was to be active with the help of these short term goals that I made on weekly basis.

See goals are very crucial in life. Goals gives meaning to our life. At times to survive goals are very important. I believe one should know why they are doing and what they are doing. What is the purpose behind doing something? Like it was really important for me to tell myself that why I am working so hard to get a certain gpa? I am achieving my goals but why I am doing what I am doing? The answer was to be a better human being, to help myself, and to help others. These goals gave meaning to my life. 

So if you were like me who never used to make goals and just went with the flow, lets think about some goals now. Take out a paper and write them. For example if your long term goal is to get a bachelor’s degree, your short term goals could be:
-Daily revising what you learned in class.
-Completing projects on time.
-Putting your best effort in completing tasks that you are assigned, etc,. After you have achieved your long term goal give reward to yourself. Pamper yourself ๐Ÿ™‚ But if you were not able to achieve your goals don’t be too hard on yourself. Modify your goals and give your best and don’t lose hope. Failure is a part of life and it teaches us valuable lessons.

Yes it is very important to make goals and they play a vital role in our life!  Good luck ๐Ÿ™‚

Boredom can make you blissfully creative! :)

Boredom is something we all face especially during summer break. I get bore easily. I have vacations for like 3 months and I am a bit worried about how will I spend that much time. I want to do something constructive because overthinking, or scrolling is not good for my mental health at all.  So I decided to deal with my boredom by doing following things:

1. I run an account on instagram by the name ayesha_raf96

2. I made a drawing book for myself for drawing and coloring in mandalas.

3. I post one picture at least everyday of a drawing.

4. I love drawing henna too so I draw henna on my niece, my sister or on my own hand just to kill time.

5. I am also reading this book emotional intelligence by Daniel Goleman nowadays.

6. I paint stones with my niece at times to keep her and myself busy.

7. I will make some cards too as I love to make handmade cards. I guess the best thing that I can give someone is my time and my love ๐Ÿ™‚

8. I am learning to drive.

9. I baby sit my niece and nephew from 7am till 3pm.

10. I watch at least two movies in a day!

So I have pretty much busy routine. Baby sitting from 7am till 3pm. Then I watch some movies and after maghrib or after 8pm I draw! That is my routine nowadays. It is good to keep oneself busy in doing something constructive ๐Ÿ™‚

Don’t get bore! Find something constructive to do. It can be anything that is of your interest ๐Ÿ™‚